The the thing is that i dont think its that he doesnt love me, he has never been bad to me and always shown alot of love towards me and i think he got scared of being with one girl for the 3 years and the rest of his life.
We got into a comfortable place with no excitement no passion nothing, just yeah we are here for eachother whatever, i think we took eachother for granted but i was just happy plodding along, i also had my own issues and didnt give him much attention and he had his own, throughout the past week the message i have got is- Right girl-wrong time, also alot of confusion on his behalf and him not sure of what he wants.
Now i know i cant force him to be with me and i dont want to! But i know him well and i know he is emotional/sensitive and cant deal with alot of things at the same time.
This is why over the weekend i was thinking you know what, im just going to leave him be. Be polite and a supportive friend when he needs it but im not going to run after him, show him that im upset and im going to keep my distance, if he loves me and wants me after sorting things out he can come back and i will think about it.
I cant just forget him or get over him it was 3 years of a very close relationship, we shared alot and had alot of attraction between us.
Now yesterday, i was happy, bubbly, my usual self and kept my distance, he kind of kept following me around a bit, and asking me to wait up for him and trying to be quite friendly.
He got the results of something and mashallah did top of the year! but later on kind of said to thin air while we were waiting for a car to pick us up 'even though i did so well why am i so depressed'- i didnt answer.
We were standing outside and he said oh i have forgotten a book so i was like ok ill meet you at the hospital and he said 'just wait me with me even though i know you hate me'- i didnt respond.
He then messaged me to go and eat with him, to which i said no thanks im in the library, 15 mins later he came to library and sat 2 spaces away from me.
Now me getting on with my own life this and showing him that im moving on might make him realise im slipping out his grips and he may come back to me, if he doesnt, well i have made some head way to moving on, so i feel its the best plan.
I still miss him though
