http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/ The largest Pakistani Bulletin board and portal en Mon, 23 Nov 2009 12:37:40 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/ http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/41616-bit-understanding.html Tue, 27 May 2008 17:52:38 GMT How happy I was to read that the state of Florida dropped all charges against Erin Markes, the 19 year old mother of a 4 year old suffering from a fatal brain malformation. WHAT a tough time this mother has had. You can read the details here: http://www.nwfdailynews.com/article/14659 WHAT... How happy I was to read that the state of Florida dropped all charges against Erin Markes, the 19 year old mother of a 4 year old suffering from a fatal brain malformation. WHAT a tough time this mother has had. You can read the details here:

http://www.nwfdailynews.com/article/14659

WHAT a sad story though. Instead of receiving help for her around-the-clock care of her son she was tossed in jail, had a so-called doctor say on national tv that it was "the worst case of neglect I've seen in 30 years", vilified on worldwide television (with an extreme blasting on the Nancy Grace show on CNN), had her parental rights taken away, received death threats. Why? Because none of them took the time to look into the particular (and rare) genetic disease that the poor child was born with. ALL of the child's medical troubles were related to the course of his disease and NOT to neglect. She actually got him to live two years beyond his life expectancy. The charges against Erin were dropped on Friday and over the weekend, her son took a turn for the worse and is hanging on by a thread. Almost like he was waiting for her to be exonerated.

I have spoken to Erin on the phone and sent her a gift of support. And she is incredibly eloquent, soft-spoken and very apparently far from ignorant. She has been dealt a hand that would crush the toughest of people yet she soldiers on.

I hope she sues the pants off some of the ignoramuses who had her vilified the world over. ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/41616-bit-understanding.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/40370-visit-grandma.html Sat, 26 Apr 2008 15:09:47 GMT Ok so I've gotten all kinds of beat up over this subject in the forums but here we go again folks....
My boys had this past week off from school, mom was lonely down south and me with my rose colored glasses thought it would be a good idea to go down for a visit. BAD idea....she was merciless. She's getting ready to sell her condo so she was constantly at them - where they are, what they're doing etc. There were so many rules which constantly changed that they were all nervous wrecks - the oldest guy, the one with some autistic traits and eating troubles was just jumping out of his skin, having nightmares, drooling....the other 2 also had trouble which means constant unhappiness. So I guess from now on, I go by myself or I go when hubby can come along and we'd stay at a hotel and visit grandma and take her out and drop her off. Very sad - I feel like my boys dont really have a grandma. Oldest son told me that he HATES going to grandmas, that she's mean to his brother (which she IS, she takes it all out on me and on my middle son). Yet I dont say anything to her. I've hinted but never really gave it to her like my dad used to do. She makes me SO depressed. I'm just so glad to be home. ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/40370-visit-grandma.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39774-way-go-oopie.html Sat, 12 Apr 2008 15:48:13 GMT I picked up my eldest yesterday and his teacher told me that all of a sudden - this week - his handwriting greatly improved! I noticed this myself at home doing his homework with him - woo-hoo!! He has much better control on the pencil and is writing with much more ease! I wonder if this new... I picked up my eldest yesterday and his teacher told me that all of a sudden - this week - his handwriting greatly improved! I noticed this myself at home doing his homework with him - woo-hoo!! He has much better control on the pencil and is writing with much more ease! I wonder if this new diet could be working???!!! I try so hard to be objective but its so great when something works, that I THINK its working but then get confirmation from teachers! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39774-way-go-oopie.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39744-neices-nicknames.html Fri, 11 Apr 2008 19:11:40 GMT ...two entirely separate issues. Neice first. Poor thing and poor husband. She was born and raised in Pak, led a pretty sheltered life. Got married to a guy who SO loves her and moved to USA with him. They seemed happy for the first few months. But now theres big trouble. Poor thing. She... ...two entirely separate issues.
Neice first. Poor thing and poor husband. She was born and raised in Pak, led a pretty sheltered life. Got married to a guy who SO loves her and moved to USA with him. They seemed happy for the first few months. But now theres big trouble. Poor thing. She has her MIL here for 3 to 6 mos, doesnt know how to cook. Was picked on muchly by mil to the point that she told MIL to go to hell. Now MIL wants to leave and this will be big news back in the home town. I will try to help out, maybe go see them this weekend and see if I can help break the ice and smooth things over.

Nicknames....lol thats been big in my family. So of course I have loving nicknames for each of my boys...eldest is "Oopie-dooper, my sunshine boy". Middle is "Binky, my treasure" and Littlest is "dookie (rhymes with cookie), my baby-mine. People think i'm nutz. Maybe i am. ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39744-neices-nicknames.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39686-i-love-spring.html Thu, 10 Apr 2008 17:25:04 GMT OMG its 70 degrees today! Coats off, buds a-bursting, and the color GREEN starting to come out! Spent the whole morning, me and youngest baby-mine, outside doing yard work, getting dirty and loving the smell of spring dirt. I cleaned out their little sandbox, need to buy lots more play-sand but... OMG its 70 degrees today! Coats off, buds a-bursting, and the color GREEN starting to come out! Spent the whole morning, me and youngest baby-mine, outside doing yard work, getting dirty and loving the smell of spring dirt. I cleaned out their little sandbox, need to buy lots more play-sand but at least it now looks clean and ready. Lawn is looking pretty good too. My bulbs well the ones that the boyz didnt pick are doing nicely. I CANT WAIT till the apple and pear trees explode their pretty pink-and-green-ness and they're almost ready!! The "squiddles" are going nutso for each other and if my hubby would/could tear his beautiful self away from his work, I'd follow suit. AHHHH SPRING!! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39686-i-love-spring.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39632-little-drummer-boy.html Wed, 09 Apr 2008 16:06:26 GMT Thank you for the kind sentiments and comments!! My son is indeed on the autism spectrum, diagnosed as PDD (Pervasive Developmental Disorder) which means he's a high-functioning autistic. A good number of autistic kids have feeding and GI issues, his just happen to be pretty extreme. Its tough to manage but heck, people can get used to anything esp when its important right? Mealtime is intensive encouragement - take out a favorite book, read a page. Take a bite and I'll read more. That kind of thing. Hubby gets him eating better than me but hubby's approach is svengali-like. "EAT. NOW. or get out." I just vant bring myself to do that lol. We use nutritional calorie boosters - theres something called "Benecalorie" - its a medical "food" that you can add to almost anything, its like concentrated nutrition. Instant breakfast. Olive oil. From time to time, we use a medication called Periactin which is actually an antihistamine but causes intense hunger. Side effect are nightmares and extreme sleepiness so we only use that when his weight is really down. Ask99, I'm sorry to hear about your friends little one...maybe some of these things would be of help to her. We went to a feeding hospital (one of only like 5 in the country) when he was 3 and it helped SO much in figuring out how to get him to eat - and the BIGGEST factor is how "safe" they deem it to be. If eating makes them feel sick or causes them pain, they'll do anything to avoid eating. Even today, when he starts refusing completely, we know he's coming down with something, he has a tummy ache or he's constipated. So your friends little one probaby hurts from eating...so needs to get the GI issues resolved. ANYway....

Middle guy does NOT have chicken pox hooray! I feel bad about the cancelled playdate but better safe than sorry. Oldest guy is doing well with the diet, eating/drinking as if nothing is different. Havent noticed any change in him yet but its only day 3 so patience mama! And littlest "baby mine", we woke up this morning and found him in our room, curled up in a ball and sleeping soundly on the DOG BED. I asked him why are you sleeping on sheena's bed? He said "I keeping sheena company." lol.

So today, eldest has his drum lesson. He LOVES it! And he is REALLY good at it! The class is 14 kids, 1st grade thru 5th and most of them are 4th and 5th graders. The teacher tells me that he keeps up with the older kids who have had a couple years of drum lessons lol! We got him a pretty expensive snare drum for xmas, it was really the only thing he wanted and it was so nice to see how badly he wanted it and his reaction when he got it. My little drummer boy! Music really reaches him, keeps him focused and paying attention. He really wants a "drum set" now!! I can just see this little little thing behind a drumset banging away!! Thank goodness we only have neighbors on one side and they're rarely home! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39632-little-drummer-boy.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39600-sigh-another-day.html Tue, 08 Apr 2008 22:27:47 GMT ok so its one of my three "mama" days where all 3 boyz are in skool, I pick up youngest at 12. So I get a call from the skool nurse at 10 that my middle guy might have chicken pox and i need to take him to doc etc. It was just bug bites (gorgeous weather lately and we've been outside alot) but it really wreaked havoc on my day and our plans...we were supposed to have a play-date today but am supposed to keep him away from other kids till we're sure that its not ckn pox. So i had to cancel.

Eldest guy is on a new diet - we are trying an elimination of ALL dairy. Sounds easy right? WELL. Even fish stix have milk protein in them. Doritos. Breads. ALL cheeses. So I went all over the place the past three days collecting milk-free cheese, milk free breads, milk free milk yadayada. I'm not doing the whole "GFCF" diet thats being touted by autism specialists, I'm just doing the "CF" part (casein free, which means milk products). Its a trial of only 2 weeks so thats not too bad. And if he indeed IS milk-sensitive or intolerant, we should see some pretty big improvements as far as focus, attentiveness and behavior. Fingers crossed. I've been wanting to try this for such a long time but his weight and eating were never good enough. But since the winter viruses ended, he's been doing so great that I decided nows the time.

That mother who was jailed for having a 10-pound 4 year old, what a heartbreaking story! OMG. The boy has lissenphaly, a genetic malformation of the brain that is fatal, usually by age 2 but this kid has made it to age 4 so far. But he's in "end stage" which means wasting and total inability to absorb any nutrients at all. The national Lissenphaly org is helping her now with both legal representation and getting her time with her son. How very sad, yeah? I cant count the times that my own son's troubles were blamed on me. Feeding aversion is such a horrible thing to deal with - and people try to compare it to fussy eaters. Theres NO comparison. Fussy eaters WILL eat the things they like. Feeding averse kids prefer the pain of starvation over the pain of hunger. HOW I wish there were at least a couple of reports on this....all you read/hear about is how to keep kids from becoming obese. What about the kids who want to STARVE??? SHEESH.

ANYway. My guy is eating his new foods, drinking his rice milk and lets see what happens....fingers crossed!!!!!!! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39600-sigh-another-day.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39321-thank-u-sara-i-m-back.html Tue, 01 Apr 2008 22:02:54 GMT Well i am back here, thx to ms sara who reminded me that this thing exists lol. Its been kind of a sad day, first the whole big day that CNN is dedicating to austism spectrum disorders (which afflicts my eldest and possibly my youngest) and also a report about a 19 yr old mom arrested and jailed... Well i am back here, thx to ms sara who reminded me that this thing exists lol. Its been kind of a sad day, first the whole big day that CNN is dedicating to austism spectrum disorders (which afflicts my eldest and possibly my youngest) and also a report about a 19 yr old mom arrested and jailed for neglect of her 4 year old son because his weight was a mere 10 pounds.

You know, if I had listened to my son's docs without firing them, MY son would also have starved. To death. He thinks, to this day, that eating is BAD. THIS mom brought her 4 year old to the doc on feb 17th, he weighed 12 pounds and he was SENT HOME. **** what kind of asshole doc was THAT? AND nurse who must have seen him? AND he was "in the radar" of social services. I'm sorry to be so on the offense here but this mom is being SO bar-b-que'd and no one is looking at the whole story. I just thank my very lucky stars that I've had the support and the ability to seek and see the specialists that my son has required for this almost secret affliction.

then, CNN is reporting on autism like its this big mystery and they're still talking about vaccines and thimerosol (mercury) even though mercury has been used to preserve vaccines for decades. But autism is increasing at such alarming rates and they are all just scratching their heads....so what about the aging population of mothers??? People USED to have babies in their teens and twenties when eggs were ripe and new. NOW, people (myself included) have babies well into their 30s when eggs are getting ready to rot. A woman is born with all the eggs she will ever produce. Sperms are re-generated so the age of the father is rather irrelevant. I had 2 miscarriages due to bad eggs so I am really pretty sure that this has had quite an effect on my son. Watching all the news and programs on the mystery of autism tends to piss me off because it really seems rather obvious to me....every parent on these shows, every interviewee - they are older parents. So WHY arent they more focusing on how to better handle the aging egg population. ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/39321-thank-u-sara-i-m-back.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32949-its-been-while.html Fri, 23 Mar 2007 14:17:12 GMT mom is here and i've been pretty busy but it is SO nice to have her here. WHAT a big help it is. and company too, a real adult to talk to lol! I think she really likes her room and the boys are behaving so nicely, not much fighting lately so thats been nice too.

My mom SAVED our bathroom! My GOODness. I was telling her the whole story and how I try to get it clean with the bleach. She told me to use this other stuff, a Mold/Mildew remover. So I sprayed the whole shower down with about half a bottle of this stuff and it looks almost NEW!!!!!!!! WITHOUT even scrubbing!!! There are still a couple of places where theres mold stains underneath the grouting but I plan to have a go at those spots today with more of that stuff and a scrub brush. WOW, did that ever make my day!

My little guy, poor thing was sick this week. First it was just a cold but then he got the "pukes". He's SO funny though....he LOVES to eat just like his mom. Insisted on having a pancake at breakfast time, he just held it in his hand for a couple of hours. But he nibbled and nibbled at it till it was gone. THEN at lunchtime, I treated us to a pizza pie. Little wanted that too. He took a couple of bites then started crying and asking for a "puke bucket". He sat there with a slice of pizza in one hand and his puke bucket in the other. He'd take a bite chew it up and then hold his face over the bucket. No pukes so another bite. What a cutie. ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32949-its-been-while.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32558-guys-psychotic.html Sat, 17 Mar 2007 21:08:09 GMT So I've been cleaning and de-cluttering my house before my mom arrives. I worked my tail off yesterday, cleaning out the coat closet, my bedroom closet and most of all, the "dining area". It looks just smashing!

Heres the thing though. We have a "dining area", a large alcove with built-in bench-seating and shelves...its U-shaped and seats 3 on each side and there are 3 levels of shelves on both long sides of the "U". These shelves have been the bane of my life - the boys climb them but cant reach the top shelves so everything that we want out of their reach ends up way up there. It was a mess to look at. All our bills and papers way up there too. I got all the papers and put them on our roll-top desk in our bedroom - we can just close the roll top to keep the boys away. I polished the crystal thats up there, re-arranged the knick-knacks and its looking lovely. And the CLOSETS my goodness - what a lovely thing it is to open and see a nicely organized and clean closet!

When hubby came home from work last night, he got SO steamed...went off looking for his bills and papers. Apparently the nightmare mess that was 5 feet up was in complete order in his mind and I discombobulated it all. No notice was taken of the closets, the shining crystal, the rank order and file of the house!!! He has visions of bill collectors knocking down our doors cause I RE-ARRANGED his papers. SHeesh! I just moved the pile from ONE place to ANOTHER.

Men can be SUCH dorks sometimes lol! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32558-guys-psychotic.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32218-really-good-week-so-far.html Tue, 13 Mar 2007 20:22:20 GMT I just love having these good days. We had a lovely steak dinner over the weekend, boys were SO good at the restaraunt. Then yesterday and today were just really good days, got alot done around the house, roasted a turkey for dinner, made lots of trimmings. Hubby was so happy that the place... I just love having these good days. We had a lovely steak dinner over the weekend, boys were SO good at the restaraunt. Then yesterday and today were just really good days, got alot done around the house, roasted a turkey for dinner, made lots of trimmings. Hubby was so happy that the place looked as nice as it did, it made my day/week/month that he noticed! I've been keeping after the boys more and more - take out a toy to play with it but PUT IT AWAY before you play with something else. Its time for them to learn this and learn it well. Anyway, its just been a really nice week so far.

Lots of housework and cooking but I also got to work in my mom's room a bit. She's on her way to new york today but will stay with my sis till sunday. I want her room to look really nice and inviting and different from when she came here with my dad. I think I've done a really nice job so far - lol - I even got out my hubby's drill today and hung a complicated 4-piece mirror! I must admit I have an ulterior motive. I would love for my mom to be here most of the time. The boys love her and I dont have anyone to watch over them. Not that I want to go out gallivanting or dump them on her but spring is coming and I LOVE to garden. Its a tough thing to do with 3 wild little indians, I have to keep a very constant eye on them. So gree-ma can sit on the deck and watch them play, make sure they arent climbing the fence, pulling up my flowers or killing each other while I plant flowers, rake and prune. AND i'll be able to get more "mommy" things done...I mean I STILL havent been to my post-partum checkup after I gave birth to number 3 son!!! Even a simple task like sorting and folding laundry is SO much easier when the boys are occupied with something else. Fingers crossed that it will be pleasant for her here.

My biggest worry is her need to scrub and clean. I do the basic stuff but dont wash walls like in the kitchen or hallway, scrub baseboards and doors, wash windows inside and out. My mom will decide to do these things, wear herself out and then get all beside herself with anger at me and my dear, hard-working hubby. THEN she can get pretty mean. I still have a few days so I plan to scrub as much as I can before she gets here.....but I think she will be ok. She's without my dad now, she's sad and the boys will be so cheering for her I think.

Ah well time to start dinner for boyz.... ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32218-really-good-week-so-far.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32020-busy-day.html Sat, 10 Mar 2007 23:35:44 GMT I gave the boys breakfast this morning then we were off and running. "Tapping dancing" class for the eldest guy at 9:30 then a birthday party to go to with middle guy. THen food shopping and dinner. whew! Looking so forward to tomorrow - I just have to bring eldest guy to yet another bday party at 10 am and then we'll have some time at home before we go out to get things for my mom's room and then out to an early dinner at my FAVE - outback. STEAK!!!! YUMMY!!!

This birthday party today. MAN it was nice but I just dont see us ever keeping up with the folks around here. There were 50 or so kids, it was held at a place called "Its MY Party", they had a naturalist with animals who gave a talk about each animal then let the kids come up to see and touch, then games, music, dancing, pizza and cake. This place charges $875 for 20 kids and $25 extra for each kid after that. This is for a 5 year old. I cant begin to imagine the sweet 16s.

I wonder yet again whether we should be living in a more down-to-earth area. This area has many, many affluent people. We certainly want for nothing but are not in that particular league. So I worry about the years ahead, whether my boys will feel the pressure from their peers for not having all that the other kids have. Maybe it would be better to be a "big fish" in a smaller ocean than a little fish in a big ocean.

Ah well, it was a nice day in any case. I'll put the concerns on the back burner and just look forward to the rest of the weekend and to my mom coming up to new yawk next week. ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/32020-busy-day.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/31917-cost-new-bath.html Fri, 09 Mar 2007 16:22:40 GMT I cant beleive it, $20 thousand to re-do a VERY small bathroom!!! omGGGG!!

The contractor was very nice, highly recommended from a person I trust but heck that is SO expensive! He's going to give us an estimate to do just a new tub/enclosure and we'll leave the rest for now. Theres really nothing wrong with the rest, it works, its clean, its just very old. Its so expensive to live here. Most people in this area are doing their baths in marble with jacuzzi tubs and sensory showers so the contractor didnt even know the going prices for the vinyl ensclosure.
ack.
ah well. we need to do it. Hopefully it wont end up breaking our hearts with the price. It will be an adventure thats for sure....we'll be about one week without a shower in the house. We'd have to have them do it in the summer when we go camping.

i better go get out my bleach and toothbrush, my mom is coming up on SUnday!! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/31917-cost-new-bath.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/31845-winter-sux.html Thu, 08 Mar 2007 14:29:14 GMT It was 9 degrees yesterday!!! The eldest has a bad cold so he didnt go to skool yesterday, youngest didnt have class and I kept the middle guy home just cause it was so cold and snowing. I hated to bring the eldest guy out with his cold. Bad choice methinks because that means I didnt start up... It was 9 degrees yesterday!!! The eldest has a bad cold so he didnt go to skool yesterday, youngest didnt have class and I kept the middle guy home just cause it was so cold and snowing. I hated to bring the eldest guy out with his cold. Bad choice methinks because that means I didnt start up the car at all yesterday. This morning, I sent elder off on the school bus and got the younger 2 all bundled into the car, turned the key and - nothing but click-click-click. Car is all frozen and needs a jumpstart. Ack. But good news is hubby got onstar service for it, we went back inside and called them, they'll be here in an hour to jump it. I dont like driving the dam thing, its too big and visibility out the sides and back is not good at all...but I have to like the service that it comes with. I guess I should mention that its an H3 hummer, my boys are just in HEAVEN over it. I am SO thankful to Ford though for their "flying car" commercial (the "Edge" flies in the commercial). So now the boys want a "flying car". Once the lease is up on our little pickup, we;ll trade it in for Mama's flying car and I will be ONE happy mama!!

Better than winning lotto lol!!! I'm getting a new bathroom AND a flying car!!!:D ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/31845-winter-sux.html http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/31786-new-bathroom.html Wed, 07 Mar 2007 17:20:49 GMT I am JUST so excited!!! Hubby agreed that I should get an estimate to re-do our bathroom. The guy is coming on Friday. THe very least we need to have done is have the tub and shower walls ripped out, the sub-walls re-done. And install a tub with enclosure, those one-piece smooth walled units so... I am JUST so excited!!! Hubby agreed that I should get an estimate to re-do our bathroom. The guy is coming on Friday. THe very least we need to have done is have the tub and shower walls ripped out, the sub-walls re-done. And install a tub with enclosure, those one-piece smooth walled units so that I dont have to scrub between tiles with a toothbrush. WOO-HOO!! Hooray! If we get a good enough tax return, we'll go for the whole shebang, new floor, paint, heat lamp yadayada. But the BEST will be not having to scrub those nasty little tiles anymore.

I saw lots of views on my journal. I was surprised, I didnt think my life was all THAT interesting lol! I was wondering about the lack of comments - they seemed to stop once I talked about the "Oopie's" birthday party. I know that desis have a "thing" about special-ed children. Beleive me though, my guy may need extra help to focus himself but he would melt the heart of the iciest person on the planet. It makes me sad that living in Pakistan is out of the question for us because they do not have the type of teachers/schools that he needs, the attitude seems to be that if you cant keep up with your peers at age 5, you are a complete loss. Basically, though my guy just needs a very small class and extra attention to be able to focus and he can and does learn the SAME things that "typically developing" kids learn. If we lived "over there", he;d be left out completely. He has every opportunity here to grow and thrive but over there, he'd be left to himself. If I happen to win this huge lotto thats going on, wouldnt it be SUCH a great thing to establish a "special-ed" school over there, the way that Oprah did in Africa for girls. Fingers and toes crossed, a dollar and a dream! ]]> Mamaof3 http://www.paklinks.com/gs/blogs/mamaof3/31786-new-bathroom.html