Sahar02

...For my friend's wedding this December, in Colorado. It's the first totally non-desi wedding I'll be going to, and I'm not sure what is appropriate/expected.

Things to note:
*I'm not in the bridal party
*It's in the winter
*I'm not sure yet the schedule of the day (what's in the morning and what's in the evening)
*I want something that is fun and young. So much of the slightly more conservative stuff either looks too formal or too old. I'm 26, I don't want to look 46.
*I can get a shrug to wear over sleeveless stuff, so I'm not really worried about that.
*Everyone says, "Oh wear a sari! They'll love that." My concerns regarding that are:
...a.There's no one there to help me tie it; I haven't tied one on my own before.
...b. I've done the sari thing to a Muslim-Paki-American/Catholic-Italian-American wedding before
...c. Sometimes desi clothes look too dressy around Western formal-wear
...d. I sort of want a new dress
*I'm very petite (5'2") and people normally say to wear short stuff; since I'm not planning on wearing anything too much above the ankles, I need outfits that are not too overwhelming for someone small.
*Dresses are expensive, but I'll look around and see if my gift cards and sale coupons will help me find a nice one. These posted below are just to get an idea of what will/won't work.

Some questions:
*If I can't find a dress, is a fancy skirt and top okay?
*Are pants okay?
*What's too dressy, if one is not in the bridal party?
*What's too informal?
*Do people wear different clothes to the church and reception?

Okay, I'm going to upload some stuff I have found. I'd love for you guys to give me an opinion on what you think is nice/appropriate, what you think is not a good idea, and also if you have other pics that you think would work, let me know.

Sahar02

Ann Taylor





Cold Water Creek



Lord and Taylor













Bloomingdales

Sahar02

Macy's







Nieman Marcus

Princess Fiona

i wish i could lend u a couple of my dresses.. I have alot of em... since we wear only such dresses in our weddings..

Sahar02

Really? I'd love some advice. Would you say any of the above are TOO fancy for a guest? Too informal?

LegallyBrown

you dont wear black to a wedding

Love this one but a shrug would ruin it.

http://www.paklinks.com/gsmedia/file.../nmarcus11.jpg

LegallyBrown

This one is awesome :love:

http://www.paklinks.com/gsmedia/file...2/nmarcus2.jpg


http://www.paklinks.com/gsmedia/file.../lntaylor3.jpg

Sahar02

^Perhaps a shawl

Sara516

Fancy skirt shud be OK.

Pants, NO!

I think a big poufy dress in white wud be too dressy

PANTS are informal

From what iv'e seen on TV and stuff, the church ceremony and reception are on the same day so it wud be impractical for them to change clothes.

syani1

Sahar, a few pointers I've learned about American weddings and dressing for them:

1) Unless it is a black-tie affair (if it is, they usually tell you in the invite) you want to keep your dress semi-formal, like a cocktail dress. Usually not full lenth, since usually the bridesmaids wear full-length dresses. The pictures you posted, almost all have full-lenth dresses. I think you're better off going with something either slightly above, below, or at, knee length.

2) Stores that have nice dresses specifically to wear to weddings, and with petit size: Ann Taylor (I think they have some of the best selection. Sophisticated and pretty, without too formal.) White House Black Market (look and see if you can find one near you. They have lovely dresses to wear for weddings), Banana Republic, J. Crew. If all else fails, Macy's (and you can always use coupons and discounts there.)

3) Pants and skirts are fine too. But since it is not summer, be sure to wear winter skirt that is still formal, and dress it up with a really nice top. If you're doing pants, same thing, nice dress pants and nice top. I've seen many women do it. And gold accessories always dress things up nicely.

4) Too formal is a dress that might possibly outshine the bride. It can't look spectacular; save it for another affair. Too informal is looking like you're going out to for shopping. Your clothes should look like you're going out for a special night in the town, dressy but not overmuch. Black is fine regardless of day or evening wedding. Keep in mind that even if things start during the day, but the time reception comes around, dinner, dancing, etc, it'll be night.

Lastly, here are some pics I found:
http://www.anntaylor.com/IWCatProduc...Id=858923#null
http://www.anntaylor.com/IWCatProduc...Id=856842#null
http://www.anntaylor.com/IWCatProduc...duct_Id=825156
http://www.anntaylor.com/IWCatProduc...duct_Id=860937

LegallyBrown

^ wouldnt wear any of 'em to a wedding.

Esp a winter wedding.

They are more of a spring cocktail party dress or going to the races.

Sahar02

Thanks, all, for the replies so far.

syani -- Those are lovely outfits. But the thing is that I don't normally wear stuff that short. I don't really mind doing it occasionally, and my husband doesn't mind if I do, but there's part of me that thinks I shouldn't shell out money for something I can't wear all the time because I'm worried about who will see me.

Ann Taylor does have great stuff. In fact, I went there today and tried on the skirts that I liked. The first two pics I posted are from Ann Taylor. The black skirt with the trail is GORGEOUS, but it's $168, and I don't think I want to spend that much.

I did buy a dress today. I'm not a 100% sure I'll wear it for the wedding, but it was on sale and it is pretty, so I figured I'd wear it if nothing else turned up, or just return it if I found something I preferred. It's a long dress from Lord and Taylor, dark brown with beading and embroidery on mesh. I couldn't find it on their website, but it's by Joanna Chen's Xscape.

Sahar02

Here's another skirt from Ann Taylor. Unlike the others, this one is on sale for $69.99

Zainab Ahmed

^^ umm no i dnt think this skirt is that pretty!..
i dont have much idea about american weddings..never have been before to one! but umm i think a simple dress would look great...it wont be that dressy..it wont make you look older than what u are.
U should upload a pic of dress u boughT!

shweetdreamz

i like this

lifeless

I need a dress...

not badd

Sahar02

Zainab -- It's not my favorite skirt, but I do like it, and with a chic and pretty top I think it could look quite nice.

Here are some more -- all from Nordstrom.

shweetdreamz

anthropologie:

http://www.anthropologie.com/jump.js...CATEGORY&all=1

http://www.anthropologie.com/jump.js...CATEGORY&all=1

Shaulabar

A few pointers:
-whatever you do, don't wear all white. Only the bride can wear white and cream.
-black is usually a no-no, but in the US it's not a big deal
-if you are going for a full lenght dress, keep the details on the dress really simple, and accessoriaze well instead. try to avoid too many complex, over-the top details and stick to simple, well cut dresses with good material preferably in a solid color. You will be able to wear these type of dress again more easily as well. Wear good jewelry, stunning shoes and a beautiful bag and shawl instead.
-there is no dress change between the ceremony and the reception
-if the wedding is in a church, shoulders should be covered. No spaghetti straps or tube tops. if your dress is cut like that, bring a shawl. short sleeves are ok. In the US, again this rule may sometimes be relaxed.
-If you are concerned about price you could try one of the stock brands such as Marshall's, TJMaxx, Ross, ect.
Good luck and have fun!!

Aashna

For winter weddings earth tones like brown, black, tan or wine are nice. The 1st brown L&T dress in your 2nd post is beautiful.

Check out www.bluefly.com for more ideas.