citrine

make shami kebab and chappal kebab etc stuff and freeze them..u can use them later as a snack or side meal .

RupayHalwa

Do they get offended by ready bought frozen parathas? Even if they do, feed it to them anyway.

Use DRIED onions for your salan and tomato puree, rather than peel n chop the real things.

If u can't get dried onions, deep fry a whole load of onions till they r brown enough for pilau or salan and blend with the oil. Store in a jar in the fridge and use for salan, add tomato puree mixed with water, this will give u super quick masala for your salan or pilau.

Buy some ginger /garlic paste in a tube or jar and use that.

Marinate anything from lamb chops, to chicken pieces and store in the freezer.

Bring in a whole load of shan or laziza masalas and make diff dishes according to instructions on back.

Also buy some laziza desserts, their gajar halwa is great.

Keema is always a good thing to have when u can't think of anything to cook.

ABOVE ALL, DO NOT LET THE IN LAWS GET TO U BY COMPARING U. I bet the MIL will try the same trick with other DIL bcos she knows that her DIL will make more of an effort to serve her better.

Some MILs expect to be treated like queens at the expense of DIL's sanity. Don't fall for it. Its your house and YOUR DOMAIN.

STAND UP FOR YOUR RIGHTS!

Mirch

Call a cab and give them money to go and eat out. You will save yourself from so much heartache.

Plan B:

When it is breakfast , lunch or dinner time , praise any dish your MIL makes and also tell her how their son misses her mom's cooking. Then ask her to make that dish and she will be more than happy to oblige. The key , here , is how pro you are in false praise and making others do things for you.

Spock

I really think your husband ought to be giving you a serious helping hand!

njgal

No need to go overboard! Keep your sanity.

Sometimes you can give then bagel and chai and sometimes you can do the paratha. Eating paratha daily is not HEALTHY anyways.

Things you can freeze and must have in your freezer

1. Deep Naan
2. Haleem (make lots of it and freeze it)
3. Make tons of bhuna ghoost and freeze it in packets and you can use it to make anything quick like any vegetable with ghoost thrown in

What do they like to eat desi / non desi?

If you feel like they are only here for 2 weeks and you want to win BONUS points for your own SAKE - let me know.

I hate to cook and I'm not a chef but I can sure wing it when it's neceaasary!

aminas

hareem01

very good tips rupayhalwa....

you can also ask your inlaws for suggestions...... aaj aap kya khana pasand farmayen gay? ...

same

LOL, good ones!

redvelvet

Hi Sahar2008,

I'm giving you some ideas for a menu and I'm basing this on what my mom and dad (yes, the both cook, LOL) do whenever we have any guest (friends, family, EVEN in-laws) over. So here goes.

Appetizers and Snacks: My mom makes shami kababs and spring rolls in advance and freezes them. These can be served as an appetizer on the day that your in-laws arrive, before serving the main meal. You can even fry them up and serve as a snack with chai on the rest of the days that your in-laws will be staying. Sometimes my mom makes and freezes samosay, other times she just buys the frozen variety. She'll even make pakoray to serve with chai one of the days. It's good to also have some cookies/and mixed nuts in your pantry. And maybe even purchase some mithai (gulab jamun, frozen ras-malai, ice cream) and store them in fridge for later use. If your in-laws are into eating healthy, you can also serve fruit chaat. As far as appetizers and snacks are concerned, this will cover u for the next several days.The ice cream and ras malai can even be used for desert.

Main Course: A chawal dish of some sort is mandatory. And we usually make biryani. And then my mom includes meat salun and somewhat vegetarian salun. For meat salan, my parents will make korma, nihari, and sometimes seekh kabab. Then my mom will make either cholay or haleem (one of the two) and palak. That is the main menu. For roti, we just buy frozen naan and warm them up in the oven/toaster when the meal is to be served.

Condiments: The condiments that my mom makes include mint chutney, imli ki chutney, and regular yogurt raita.

Desert: Since my parents in-laws are not much for American deserts, my parents serve traditional desi sweets. My mom will make gajar ka halwa, or kheer, or gajrela, or rasmalai.

Breakfast: If your in-laws will be staying over. Then purchase some already made parathas, or even frozen halway poori and cholay from your local desi market, they are delicious. And have some achar on hand. Other than that, you can always fry up an omelet, that works too

MIX IT UP: Don't over-work yourself because dealing with in-laws is stressful enough as it already is. Make the dishes that you can make........for the rest........JUST BUY IT FROM THE STORE! Make what you can and buy what you can. It's good to buy some pre-made deserts/snacks. And don't worry about your mother-in-law. Mother-in-laws seem to have a habit of comparing.

I hope this helped. I'm sure everything will turn out great. Best wishes!

Chamak

Be confident, always have a smile on your face and never show your irritation at anything they say! Remember, you be the bigger person and come out shining from these trying two weeks!
I will second Deep naans, the tandoori ones in particular, they are VERY good! You can find them in the freezer section of your desi store. As with the other posts, I will suggest to cook in large batches in advance and freeze everything. Like your salans kababs etc. It's wayy easier and you won't be struggling everyday they are there to cook fresh. For breakfast, you can do those frozen parathas and either omelette or fried anda. You can also serve suji ka halwa (it is sooo easy to make!) with your parathas one day.

Good luck!

njgal

Sahar - it also helps to have little snacks in your house. Fruit, bake a cake and put it on a cake plate and leave it out on the dinning table, cake rusk, a tray of nuts, (almonds, walnuts etc)

Something they can quickly grab and you don't need to get involved.

midnighteyes

Some great tips!
Hope the visit goes smoothly and you dont get too stressed!!
Since hubby is not helping out, make sure he at least helps out by taking you all out to a restaurant at least 3-4 times during the visit, so you can get some rest!

njgal

Stock up on these things for No Fuss Breakfasts
Bagels and Cream Cheese (my MIL and FIL love Bagels ) I got them hooked!
Donuts
Cake Russ
Toast
Cake Slices
Bakarkhani

(all this can be bought ahead of time)

No fuss Lunches

Desi Stuff: Buy freezer storage containers and freeze one time portions of daal, haleem, ghost, koftay, nihari, keema whatever you are making in the next few weeks - make more of it and freeze half in containers. When they are here, just take a container heat in a pot. throw in haara dhaania/ hari irch/ two spoons of shaan masala for kick - you will be all set.
(Make sure you don't do this with vegetables)

- Homemade pizza - go to any grocery store - go to their deli or cheese section / get cheese pizza ready to bake (not from the frozen section). Throw bunch of toppings - left overs meat and voila homebaked pizza

Also on the weekend - when you take them out for shopping, attractions then eat out.




Dinners
- Eat out
-

xoxo ZARA xoxo

Sahar, this forum is really helpful...
Good Luck and InshAllah everything will b good..

RupayHalwa

Sahar, this forum is UNITED AGAINST CRUELTY FROM MOTHER-IN-LAWS, please visit again...

Mirch

It is easier than you think. Every night pretend to be nice and take a glass of milk with two capsules of Valium mixed in it to her telling her "ammi aap bohat kamzoor lag rahi hain yeah doodh peeain sub theek ho ja-a ga" She will be very drowsy all day long and you will have your peace and quite.
Do not repeat this every day she will be suspicious , try different things , like mix them in juice , sharbat , halwa , kheer etc etc.

You have to be creative in achieving your goals , you want her love and affection give her some. Like you can offer that milk every night the way she would like it. Make some Halwa , kheer specially for her .Peel an apple or orange during the day and try to feed her with your own hands , tell her that you did it just for her . Make her feel special.

Now switch places , if someone does all that for you like if someone wants to make you feel special , what would be your reaction, would you love that person or still keep that hidden agenda in your mind ?
Forget what others say about their MILs , or what others say about your MIL , just shower her with your love and affection and you will get nothing but love and affection in return.

If you do not believe me then try to visualize your mother and try to remember how she made you feel special and that is why you love your mother. Even if your mother did not make you feel special try to think how would you feel if someone put an effort to make you feel special.

same

^nice ideas

njgal

Good luck with everything Sahar.

A key to a good relationship with MIL is "in one ear and out the other". Don't give much importance to what they have to say.

Pareezay

I agree with Mirch, if she's comparing you to other SILs then she probably does the same with them.. it's the perfect way to get her DILs to go crazy trying to impress her. If you feel your mil is not the kind who you can be friends with then treat her formally and ignore her complaints and rants. Be respectful but don't let her get to you. If she has been hard to please all this while then the truth is, that's how it will always remain.
Great tips on this page.. but remember, don't overdo anything or kill yourself trying to please them. If she can't appreciate what you do for her then she doesn't really deserve it all.

Obama

Are you kidding!....................

She could throw mhwa out of the ............White House............