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1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends…
Stupid Question: Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer: Don’t u know, I sell tickets in black over here…
2. In the bus:
A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:- Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia…..why don’t you try again.
3. At a funeral:
One of the teary-eyed people asks…
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?
4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question: Is the “<WHATEVER> sandwich” good??
Answer: No, it’s terrible and made of adulterated cement. We occasionally also spit in it.
5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years
Stupid Question: OH WOW!! , you’ve become so big.
Answer: Well you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.
6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask…
Stupid Question: Is the guy you’re marrying good?
Answer:-No, he’s a miserable wife-beating insensitive lout…it’s just the money.
7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call…
Stupid Question:- Sorry. were you sleeping?
Answer:- No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping…. You dumb witted moron.
8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
Stupid Question: Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer: No, its autumn and I’m shedding……
9. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…
Stupid Question:- Tell me if it hurts?
Answer: No it wont. It will just bleed.
10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman in your office asks…
Stupid Question: Oh, so you smoke.
Answer: Gosh, it’s a miracle …………it was a piece of chalk and now it’s in flames!!!
Ik zindagi theee Fida kar dee
<Beep Beep> ki intehaaa kar deee
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