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1)
A newly married man asked his wife, "would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly,"i'd have married you no matter who left you a fortune."
2)
Q: Why are New Yorkers always depressed?
A: The light at the end of their tunnel is New jersey.
3)
"When people ask me if i have any spare change," says comedian Nick Arnette, "i tell them i have it at home in my spare wallet."
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