Myth

Planet of the Apes: Secrets Revealed

1. Silicon-enhanced chests and lips reveal that humans are not only "as innovative as they are cruel," but pretty vain as well.
2. Wahlberg's neglect in removing his shirt through the entire film reveals his kinship with the teen demographic: BACKNE SUFFERERS.
3. Fox Marketing Department determined that the ideal garment for a young ape's human pet is a peach-colored dress.
4. All inflamed baboon buttocks in the film were edited out.
5. Most extras were actually disgruntled gorillas out of work since the movie Congo.
6. Kris Kristofferson's surly acting style is a result of the neverending pain of Millenium’s failure at the box office.
7. The imagery of the Ape army’s red tents taken straight from Biblical writings dealing with how women were separated from the tribe during their periods. (Charlton Heston’s idea.)
8. Helena Bonham Carter's clothing came under-budget through some seamstress' creativity and Rue McClanahan's wardrobe. Her wildly trendy haircut however, accounted for %15 of the film’s budget.
9. According to ape acting union, the 'Ape' Lincoln Memorial had to be scrubbed down with monkey feces in order to get rid of foul human odor.

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"The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat."