Addressing parents in law

**TLK** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:33 PM

*inspired by Sara's thread in Parenting*

What do you call them, you married people? I am seeing more and more in young crowd that they call their inlaws aunty/uncle. Sorry but I find it little odd. I call my MIL and FIL, what my wife calls them. Mummy and Papa. She calls my mom Ammi.

**sweetNsour** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:36 PM

I call my parents in law..mom and dad, as that's what my husband calls them. He calls my parents ammi and papa.

**Sara516** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:38 PM

We all call our MIL Ammi...but the husbands all call our moms Aunty and Uncle.

**TLK** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:40 PM

^ that is unfair.

I know that if your MIL/FIL were you real aunty/uncle like chachi/chacha, khalaa/khaloo, then it makes sense. Otherwise I think calling them Mom/Dad brings you closer to each other.

**AnjanaSaDil** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:40 PM

i call his parents ammi and abu

he calls my parents aunty and uncle..cuz my parents are wayyy younger than his parents (who are my grandparents ages) so he feels its more fair to call my parents aunty, uncle. i dont mind, whatever hes more comfy with...

**NaMaan** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:43 PM

MIL / FIL are not your real parents . Isn't it fair to just call them with some other name, than the one you use for your own parents ?

**Sara516** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:44 PM

.

**TLK** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:45 PM

Originally Posted by AnjanaSaDil

i call his parents ammi and abu

he calls my parents aunty and uncle..cuz my parents are wayyy younger than his parents (who are my grandparents ages) so he feels its more fair to call my parents aunty, uncle. i dont mind, whatever hes more comfy with...

Ok. but a given couple of aunty/uncle can be older than your own mom and dad too. Calling someone aunt/uncle does not mean they need to be younger than your parents, right?

**TLK** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:46 PM

Originally Posted by NaMaan

MIL / FIL are not your real parents . Isn't it fair to just call them with some other name, than the one you use for your own parents ?

How about Saas ji, Susar Sahab?

**libranrulz** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:49 PM

awesome idea TLK ... discuss it with ur wifey before callin them that thou

**Spiral** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:50 PM

I call his parents ammi abbu.. he calls my parents uncle aunty.. whatever he is fine with.. Doesn't matter. We hardly see my parents now. His on the other hand are frequently visiting us or we visit them.

I think there was a smiliar thread not too long ago.

**Sara516** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:50 PM

IMO....once ur married and the dynamics are established..its much harder to change it..especially when the whole family follows it without any issue.

**AnjanaSaDil** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:51 PM

Originally Posted by TLK

Ok. but a given couple of aunty/uncle can be older than your own mom and dad too. Calling someone aunt/uncle does not mean they need to be younger than your parents, right?

true TLK, but i think it just comes down to personal preference and the way u see things...

this is just the way my hubby feels. my parents are in their late 40's whereas his are in their 70's, so to him personally he prefers addressing them as 'aunty' 'uncle' which he deems more 'age appropriate'.

**firenze** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:52 PM

abhi yeh waqt aya nahi ... lekin practice jari hai

**khawateen** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:52 PM

i dont see why its odd TLK...

ive tried but i just cant... i call my in laws aunty uncle and my husband does the same with my folks.. we both have tried to use the ammi abbu terms but aint quite there yet

THOUGH on the other hand

sometimes i have a freudian slip... when i see aunty in the role of a mother and i thoughtlessly end up calling her ammi... like when i cant find something and im just too caught up in the frenzy ...

**automne77** · Feb 9th, 2010 03:57 PM

I call my MIL and FIL aunty and uncle....and my hubby does the same.... sorry to say this but I have seen in his/my family where DILs call PILs ammi abbu and so on but they are least bit sincere with the PILs .... and they only believe in getting farther away from everyone.... and even though I do not call my MIL ammi, elders come closer to us by the respect we show them and by the love they feel coming from you. At least in my case that is what has happened Alhamdulillah

**NaMaan** · Feb 9th, 2010 04:01 PM

Originally Posted by TLK

How about Saas ji, Susar Sahab?

May be .

But I think it will be totally weird for me to call some other lady as 'Ammi' . May be aunty jee OR something else . But not Ammi . I am too possessive .

**philosophy** · Feb 9th, 2010 04:03 PM

my mom is my mom. no one can take her place. a MIL has her own place, no?

if it's about giving her respect, you can call her Aunty, etc.

**TLK** · Feb 9th, 2010 04:04 PM

Originally Posted by khawateen

i dont see why its odd TLK...

...

Maybe I see it odd cause I dont do that

.. you know our habits always make more sense to us than someone elses.

But at least my assumption that more and more younger crowd is leaning towards calling their in laws, unlce and aunty was not so wrong after all. I mean all you married folks are pretty young, right?