how to say goodbye

sadzzz · Sep 8th, 2008, 03:49 AM

to ur child at childcare?

it was my bubloos first day at childcare today.. and needless to say, it was quite painful..

she was quite happy to go there, happy to have all the toys she could wish for.. but when the minder asked me to say bye.. it was all tears.. and they didnt stop.. well the tears stopped, but the whinging didn't.. oh my poor baby..

i personally think, if i hadnt said bye, she would have been ok.. but the bye bye procedure is horrible for me and her..

and no, im not gonna stop her from going... i believe, regardless of when i put her in childcare (or kinder or school), its gonna happen... this way at least she'll be a bit more used to it...

but how does one stop the tears???

stylobabe · Sep 8th, 2008, 04:05 AM

she will get used to it in a week or so dont worry

how old is she?

SaadiaB · Sep 8th, 2008, 04:41 AM

yeah, give it some time.

Afro-Sheen · Sep 8th, 2008, 11:44 AM

give it a week or 2, and the best bet for her to adjust better is give her a quick firm goodbye. Its HARD...trust me i know as my son went to childcare recently.....but its best for their adjustment. Give her a week or 2 to adjust and be familiar with surroundings, caretakers..etc. is it possible for you to start her off 1/2 day to begin with, and shift it to whole day? That really helped. Due to circumstances, we had to send him full day but it was horrible....him crying etc...
but then i was able to start over and send him 1/2 days.....and he got better & even had fun there and started to play etc...at 1st alone...and slowly with other babies/kids. Inshallah in time it gets better....for them...hehe honestly i would cry in the car every single day after saying goodbye....but it does get better, trust me.

carpdiem · Sep 8th, 2008, 11:50 AM

It was first day form my son too at a new day care... he loved his old day care but I got opening at this better one and decided to go with it... but today When i dropped him off I was kind of regretting it... he is 8 months old and when I went in the room and teachers talked to him he was all smiley but as soon as i had him down on floor he kind of firgured I was leaving and he kept clinging and hugging me....
i could tell he had this anexity face and then he didnt want to play with any of the toys there or go to anyone there... i stayed for abotu 10 minutes and tehn kind of sneaked out....
wonderign if I should go see him in lunch time... or maybe he will jsut start crying as son as he sees me....

sadzzz · Sep 9th, 2008, 07:20 PM

Thanks guys for all your advice.

Past few days have been a bit hectic with taking bubz to childcare. She's only 19 months

but I think we're in a similar situation to you Afro-sheen. We both work full-time.. and mum had been lookign after her for the past 6 months but she's got her hands full now with anothe grand-daughter.. and another on the way... aaannyhows..

I got hubby to take her on the 2nd day (as he's going to be dropping her off each morning neways) and she cried for about 2 hours but was quite settled after that... and today, she cried i think for about 15-20 minutes and seems to be doing ok now... I'll call in a bit to find out how she is..

At the end of the day, I have noticed, she's a lot happier and less chir-charri.. and she zonks out at a semi-reasonable time... she'll prob sleep a lot earlier tonight as we're both at work... Inshallah!

NaMaan · Sep 9th, 2008, 07:36 PM

No No No ... it will never be ok ... I m in grad school and I still miss my mommy

WHAT !!

sadzzz · Sep 9th, 2008, 07:42 PM

hahaha

im sure she misses me too and i miss her just as badly but she doesnt get any kind of stimulation at home. Hence, I am happy for her to be there and learn to paint and do all sorts of things she cant do at home.. plus theres sooo many toys for her to get her tiny lil hands on... she loves that!

herryjohn · Sep 10th, 2008, 04:08 AM

you can do it better

Afro-Sheen · Sep 10th, 2008, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sadzzz

Thanks guys for all your advice.

Past few days have been a bit hectic with taking bubz to childcare. She's only 19 months

but I think we're in a similar situation to you Afro-sheen. We both work full-time.. and mum had been lookign after her for the past 6 months but she's got her hands full now with anothe grand-daughter.. and another on the way... aaannyhows..

I got hubby to take her on the 2nd day (as he's going to be dropping her off each morning neways) and she cried for about 2 hours but was quite settled after that... and today, she cried i think for about 15-20 minutes and seems to be doing ok now... I'll call in a bit to find out how she is..

At the end of the day, I have noticed, she's a lot happier and less chir-charri.. and she zonks out at a semi-reasonable time... she'll prob sleep a lot earlier tonight as we're both at work... Inshallah!

Yeah pretty much the same situation. My son will turn 21 months later this month. And i agree that at the end of the day it is better for them, at least for people in our situation where both parents need to work. For the person that says its better if you do it yourself, true...but do not have that luxury.

Also when I was able to leave my son with grandparent for a bit, my dad was not able to provide the same level of care/stimulation/teaching they can at daycare, plus all the toys, ABC's/songs/dance....etc....

Ansoon · Sep 10th, 2008, 10:26 AM

my nephew goes to daycare and doesn't even bother him to say good buy to his parents lol.. he was so excited to go to the daycare that when his parents said goodbye to him he just waved his hand like no big deal.. lol

give it sometime .. i think it is natural to feel this way for both of you..

same · Sep 10th, 2008, 10:42 AM

oh u r not the only one i work full time too. I drop my 11 months old daughter to babysitter. It wasn't easy, but she got used to it in couple weeks.

same · Sep 10th, 2008, 10:46 AM

^ab tu

TA TA BYE BYE ALLAH Hafiz

Numb · Sep 10th, 2008, 10:48 AM

not give it to childcare anyway

that is the solution. Childcare, Childcare, Childcare.

jalebi121 · Sep 10th, 2008, 11:00 AM

don't make it so abrupt...my sister used to scream whenever she got separated from my mom even for a minute, so what my mom did is that she used to stay in the corner of the class. the teacher made a special effort to keep her engaged with the other classmates and my sis gradually got so busy with her new classmates that she forgot her anxiety. now she is 23 and always wants to be AWAY from my mom!