Chances of getting married again - Page 7

smilly · Jul 2nd, 2009, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sara516

^ and who are u to decide what's a genuine reason?

In the end, its the person who has to live with that miserable spouse or evil in laws. If you're not in their shoes then you shouldn't judge. And frankly, if you dont' consider someone worthy of your attention if they are divorced.....then they should be blessed they are saved from ppl like that.

Sorry but I don't think unmarried people should be giving advice on marriage/divorce issues.

Well said Sara

PaRtyGuyz · Jul 2nd, 2009, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by njgal

Realistically what are the chances of a woman who got divorced to get remarried again. Is divorce still considered such a BIG TABOO in our culture?

Would you consider married someone who was a divorcee? Why or why not?

I Wouldn't mind her as my 2nd, 3rd or 4th wife!

smilly · Jul 2nd, 2009, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PaRtyGuyz

I Wouldn't mind her as my 2nd, 3rd or 4th wife!

Intresting!
Why not first??

PaRtyGuyz · Jul 2nd, 2009, 03:32 PM

^^ you want me to divorce an existing one?

NJMasti · Jul 2nd, 2009, 05:45 PM

^hahah - wow you guys are writing good original jokes here

keep it up! lol

NewBeginning · Jul 3rd, 2009, 02:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by smilestar

i'm divorced, or rather have been divorced. i have a 4 and a half year old son from my previous marriage. it is very, very difficult for a women from our culture to get remarried. firstly, being divorced is a taboo in itself. on top of that, having a child..it's almost impossible to find a decent rishta for yourself again. regardless of why the divorced happened, even if the girl was not at fault, it's always assumed that the girl didn't try hard enough or work hard enough to make the marriage work. but we all have a breaking point, yeah? maybe someone can go further than the next person, but there's only so much we can take.

i have been blessed to have strong support from my immediate family, and i never felt that i wasn't welcomed back home. if it wasn't for them, i don't think i would have left my previous marriage.

but alhumdulillah a million times over, i am married to the most sweet and understanding guy now. he fully accepts and loves my son as his, and has never made me feel bad or given me any 'tanay' for what's happened in the past. but, my extended family continues to look down upon the fact that i got married again. as if, now that i'm divorced, my life is over and i can no longer get married again

so at the end of it..yes, it's very difficult for a divorcee to get married, but there are a few gems out there that actually make life worth living again.

I'm very happy that everything worked out so well for you.

I'm a divorcee too, I don't have much to add to this discussion. I've got a cousin who is divorced with children and some years ago she remarried again. When I was a very little girl, my mamoo divorced and his former wife is happily remarried now. I have another two three divorced cousins and some of them are remarried too.

It's mixed. Some divorcees are lucky enough to find someone else, others aren't. I agree though that it's more difficult for females, they mostly do get the blame, even when it wasn't their fault. There still are many people who have a problem with divorcees. Unless the female lives in the west, then she can get most rishtay from Pakistan, because of her western passport. The question is, is it worth it to marry someone like that, who doesn't really want you, but only your passport? Great choice, isn't it? First husband chooses you because of your looks, then you have a second chance for marriage and most rishtay are from Pakistan, mainly because of your western passport. Who likes you for the kind of person you are... I think it's not meant to be for some people. It would be nice though to know what it's like to have a husband you love and to know what a loving relationship is like. But that's life. Everyone has something he or she lacks in life.

Anokhi Ladli · Jul 3rd, 2009, 03:47 AM

Chicken Biryani...divorced women aren't 'worth' your attention? Get a grip. What about those women who have a genuine reason to get divorced eg. domestic abuse or threats by the husband that he will re-marry.

PaRtyGuyz · Jul 3rd, 2009, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NJMasti

^hahah - wow you guys are writing good original jokes here

keep it up! lol

Cant say anything about real jokes though, but i don't mind marrying a divorced girl.

Chicken Biryani · Jul 3rd, 2009, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anokhi Ladli

Chicken Biryani...divorced women aren't 'worth' your attention? Get a grip. What about those women who have a genuine reason to get divorced eg. domestic abuse or threats by the husband that he will re-marry.

Anokhi you havnt read the thread through hai na ? please read post 41 in the same thread .. all answers are there ... no one said genuine cases of divorce , where a person has been wronged are to be blamed

...

Why should a person who has suffered and being wronged be blamed , the oppressor is to be blamed not the victim !

candy_apple · Jul 4th, 2009, 12:20 AM

What are the chances a divorced woman will get married again? They are still fairly good. My parents divorced when I was 8 because my dad was physically and verbally abusive towards my mother. Since then she has continuously gotten rishtas from other divorced or widowed men and continues to get them till this day.

On the flip side, it may be a bit more difficult for younger divorced girls to remarry as a lot of desi guys don't want their first marriage to be with a divorcee. It is unfortunate they think this way, but we have a family friend....the girl is about 30 years old and divorced...she married really young like when she was 21 and got divorced 6 months later. We don't know the reasons why nor will we ask them, however, she has had trouble getting married. She has been single since her divorce, even though she is really pretty and her family is loaded. I asked her if there is "anyone" in her life and she just responded with "Desi guys will date a divorced girl, but they won't marry her." My heart goes out to her and others in that situation.

Naz-O-Nakhra · Jul 4th, 2009, 01:59 PM

"I asked her if there is "anyone" in her life and she just responded with "Desi guys will date a divorced girl, but they won't marry her."

lol.. and where is she from Peshawar??

I don't think men have a problem marrying a divorced woman ( Especially in the West) as long as they click with each other and are fairly open minded.. they will go for each other regardless.

shamsa_sh · Jul 6th, 2009, 03:13 PM

why it should be taboo, who cares about culture, only religion matters in this serious situation, and do hell wid what ppl would say about a divorced gal, its personnal.

mirage · Jul 6th, 2009, 04:01 PM

Well it doesnt remain personal when someone comes up on e forum and asks for an opinion. This thread was not about cursing divorced people but awfully it has been turned into one. Divorce dpeople are just normal and they live in normality. Their chances for getting married are always open. Or if they are drastic, they can be jut same for the un married ones too. Only a person themselves may be a hindrance if they dont want to.