Gender of Unborn Child

mrsshy · Oct 16th, 2009, 05:24 AM

Hi

Does anyone know if it is permissable 'islamically' to ask the midwife of your child's gender at the 20 week scan?

Wot do u guys recommend, waiting or asking?

Thanks

TLK · Oct 16th, 2009, 01:44 PM

It should be perfectly fine if one is asking for the information sake only and not to terminate the baby. Islamically speaking, after 40 days, soul enters the fetus which means that gender has been decided already.

Sahar02 · Oct 17th, 2009, 06:09 PM

What makes you think it wouldn't be permissable?

Iyla · Oct 17th, 2009, 08:29 PM

^ ditto?!

Nomadic2009 · Oct 17th, 2009, 09:51 PM

I think there is an ayat in the Quran which is along the lines that only Allah knows whats in the mother's womb.
Please correct me if I am wrong because I do not know for sure.
Maybe that is a reason why people might think whether its rightful to know about the gender.

That brings me to another question for parents and parents-to-be.
How many of you never found out the sex of your child and left it to be a surprise and how many of you just couldn't wait beyond the 18 week scan to find out what you were having?

Sahar02 · Oct 17th, 2009, 11:18 PM

We couldn't wait. I figure, it's a surprise, whenever you find out!

TLK · Oct 17th, 2009, 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nomadic2009

I think there is an ayat in the Quran which is along the lines that only Allah knows whats in the mother's womb.
Please correct me if I am wrong because I do not know for sure.
Maybe that is a reason why people might think whether its rightful to know about the gender.

That brings me to another question for parents and parents-to-be.
How many of you never found out the sex of your child and left it to be a surprise and how many of you just couldn't wait beyond the 18 week scan to find out what you were having?

You are right about the ayat. That just means that allah know from the time baby was conceived. We learn about it 20 weeks later.

Sahar02 · Oct 17th, 2009, 11:34 PM

^ And tho we know gender (usually), that doesn't mean we know all that Allah knows about the child.

TLK · Oct 17th, 2009, 11:34 PM

Yup, that is true.

Nomadic2009 · Oct 18th, 2009, 01:15 PM

We will Inshallah find out in a few days what we are having and I just cannot wait.

Silaaj · Oct 20th, 2009, 01:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrsshy

Hi

Does anyone know if it is permissable 'islamically' to ask the midwife of your child's gender at the 20 week scan?

Wot do u guys recommend, waiting or asking?

Thanks

Islamically I guess it doesnt matter. However, at the end of the day, if Allah SWT want to keep something from you, then no ultrasound can tell you anything.

I know of one case in our family, where the doc told the mom that she was having a girl, and the mom pinked up in preparation. But it turned out to be a boy in the end. The baby's position inside the womb can easily cause doctors to mistake a boy for a girl, and vice versa.
At times, even the presence of twins is a surprise not revealed till the actual birth. So it all depends.
But yeah, Islamically, theres nothing that prohibits this.

Decent 6Chora · Oct 20th, 2009, 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nomadic2009

I think there is an ayat in the Quran which is along the lines that only Allah knows whats in the mother's womb.

There is a ayat and its is also true that science has to wait for specific period of time to figure out the gender while Allah knows it from day 1 the baby is conceived (or even before that)

mrsshy · Oct 28th, 2009, 08:52 AM

Hi

For our first child we didn't ask the doctors what we were having, as we had suffered a miscarriage before and we jsut wanted a healthy child.

So many couples in the family find out what they are having and name the baby, so when the baby is born it doesn't feel exciting for the rest they just say oh yes and now the baby girl or boy is here and its already named.

I really don't want to be tempted to ask for my 2nd pregnancy but then again during my scan i may change my mind again...lol

The only reason I was thinking Islamically it may NOT be permissable is as Allah is all knowing and we shouldn't try to look into the future which is Shirk. And I know what you mean at 20 weeks you are looking at the ultra sound and not the future technically.

But I will try to wait as subr is the best.

May we all have healthy children, Inshallah.

mahismart · Nov 8th, 2009, 06:13 AM

BTW, doctors are not supposed to tell the parents or the family about the gender. It can be shared with the obstetrician if there is a chance of any gender related disease or any other problem.

There is a ban in India and the doctor's license is suspended if they disclose the info.

mrsshy · Nov 16th, 2009, 08:38 AM

In the Uk u are allowed to ask at the 20 week scan. But yes of course they can always get it wrong. i suppose for the ladies that need to have many scans they will know for definite what the sex is.

midnighteyes · Nov 16th, 2009, 06:35 PM

Quote:

BTW, doctors are not supposed to tell the parents or the family about the gender. It can be shared with the obstetrician if there is a chance of any gender related disease or any other problem.

Why do you say they are not supposed to tell. According to like their medical ethics?

Quote:

There is a ban in India and the doctor's license is suspended if they disclose the info.

In India wasnt it banned because alot of people got abortions if they found out they were having a girl?

Personally I would find out...makes things easier to plan ahead (nursery, clothes, names etc). I would only share the info with immediate family though [parents, siblings, inlaws]

RupayHalwa · Nov 17th, 2009, 03:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TLK

It should be perfectly fine if one is asking for the information sake only and not to terminate the baby. Islamically speaking, after 40 days, soul enters the fetus which means that gender has been decided already.

The 40 days thing. I used to think that also, but then I looked into it and now i conclude that it looks like the soul enters the fetus after 120 days.

Surprised? So was I!

UZ · Nov 17th, 2009, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nomadic2009

I think there is an ayat in the Quran which is along the lines that only Allah knows whats in the mother's womb.
Please correct me if I am wrong because I do not know for sure.
Maybe that is a reason why people might think whether its rightful to know about the gender.

That brings me to another question for parents and parents-to-be.
How many of you never found out the sex of your child and left it to be a surprise and how many of you just couldn't wait beyond the 18 week scan to find out what you were having?

This ayaat is right but see it in different context like you will never know before concieving that what might get in your womb.