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Oct 31st, 2009, 02:07 AM
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#41 (permalink)
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Jersey Girl
Join Date: Jul 29, 2008 - 11:43 am
Location: lost! Can you tell me where I am?!
Posts: 3,020
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Quote:
Originally Posted by candy_apple
Am I the ONLY one that would prefer my mom be there over my husband? I can't fathom the thought of him being there. My mother is so motherly. She is the type of mother that massages my head or tummy when it hurts (even now that I am a grown adult). She is so motherly, I feel that when I am in THAT much pain, only a motherly figure could put me at ease. I feel my husband would be useless in that situation.
Then again, my husband really wants to be there. I've told him I prefer that he is not there, but he is not having it. :S
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I can never ever imagine being in the labor room and mom being anywhere even near 10 mile radius.
Hubby is it!
wow - you are super close to your mom.
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Oct 31st, 2009, 02:31 AM
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#42 (permalink)
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khatoon-e-khaas from delhi darbaar
Join Date: Sep 9, 2000 - 1:00 am
Posts: 3,848
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i think its just about comfort level.. i was ok with having my mom, AND my MIL there for the delivery.. probably would have if husband had allowed me to.. he wanted to be the only one there..
like someoen else said before me.. sharam is the LAST thing on ure mind when ure in labour and delivering a baby... and quite honestly.. i really do think an experienced confident woman is an ASSET in the delivery room...
woman having the baby is just brainless, the husband (especially a first time dad) is just in shock but trying to do his best at being there.. so a 3rd party can be wonderful... especially if ure delivery is taking way too long and drs are talkin a whole lotta hogwash! i know i could have used my mom there to kick the midwife up her butt and make her perform a c sec, which later on was realized by the midwife herself as what should have been the right path of delivery instead of a VERY long vaginal delivery 
standing alone on a street of broken dreams
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Oct 31st, 2009, 01:31 PM
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#43 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 23, 2007 - 5:47 am
Location: calgary,canada
Posts: 2,218
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i can't take anybody in besides my own hubby. if no option i'll prefer go alone. but i guess i'm done now n hopefully wo't need to go there again IA 
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Oct 31st, 2009, 03:14 PM
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#44 (permalink)
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Member
Join Date: Oct 31, 2006 - 3:18 pm
Location: Uk
Posts: 407
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i cant imagine having my husband beside me, while iam screaming and all ...
i wont feel comfortable at all no matter how much i love him but i think hes better off staying outside ... i*ll better have my mother with me ...
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Oct 31st, 2009, 03:35 PM
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#45 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 1, 2009 - 4:47 am
Location: hmmm lets see.....:)
Posts: 650
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well i had deliver my baby alone in the labour room with lady doctors and my case was sensitive i didnt met my hubby for two days and any one else as they didnt allow only by the time i delivered my first time  no one was there my parents are abroad very tough and sad time for me.
the nurses and there head keep tellin that its ur pain u have to bear it its bad to yell and know ur hubby that ur in pain bla blaaaaaa and i was like what the hell is happening itna bura timeeee  .but i know for one thing if my hubby would have been there un ka to definatly dill kharab ho jana tha he cant see these things any way time has passed away.....
but when my cutooooooooo sweeeetoooo baby came ohhh goush i had forgotten every thing  )))) he was sooooo adorable  now he is 17months old.(MashAllah)
MAY ALLAH BLESS U ALL (AMEEN)
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Oct 31st, 2009, 07:03 PM
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#46 (permalink)
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Jersey Girl
Join Date: Jul 29, 2008 - 11:43 am
Location: lost! Can you tell me where I am?!
Posts: 3,020
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For all those that are comfy with mom in the labor room - I just don't get it.
I mean you hubby has seen you not your mom! then how can you? oh my gosh !!!!
I would rather choose to die than have mom in the room. (Now don't give me lecture on oh your mom is the one who changed your diaper in the first place)... *horrified*
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Oct 31st, 2009, 07:56 PM
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#47 (permalink)
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2, 2009 - 11:19 am
Location: UK
Posts: 201
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aww shk_14..feel sorry for you...i dnt know what i would do if i didnt have me mum or hubby...kasm i think ur really brave.
i took my hubby both times and he was so good even though he kept trying to grab my her from my face...it was sooo irritating!! but mashaalah he coped really well, i wouldnt have it any other way..they should also be able to see what us women go thru. 
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Oct 31st, 2009, 07:58 PM
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#48 (permalink)
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2, 2009 - 11:19 am
Location: UK
Posts: 201
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sorry i meant "grab my hair from my face!!"...i think im tired..!!
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Oct 31st, 2009, 10:10 PM
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#49 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 16, 2001 - 1:00 am
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 1,838
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for first one i was in pak n was left on the mercy of some very merciless nurses n doc.
my hubby was there just once when we had our second one....n because i tend not to scream etc....he thinks it wasn't a biggie....
third time hubby was in another country n i went for a c-section in 32nd week....
n the last one ...hubby was meant to come after dropping kids to school....he did...but the babycame 5 minutes earlier than the father...hehe
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Nov 1st, 2009, 12:43 AM
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#50 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 23, 2007 - 5:47 am
Location: calgary,canada
Posts: 2,218
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NJMasti
For all those that are comfy with mom in the labor room - I just don't get it.
I mean you hubby has seen you not your mom! then how can you? oh my gosh !!!!
I would rather choose to die than have mom in the room. (Now don't give me lecture on oh your mom is the one who changed your diaper in the first place)... *horrified*
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LOLbut i'm with u on this one. my mil wanted to come with me in my recent delivery n my hubby was ok with it. i was like how can u decide that for me...no way!! but he was more worried abt his mom's feelings.
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Nov 1st, 2009, 01:20 AM
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#51 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 1, 2008 - 12:45 am
Posts: 2,569
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xjatti2khanx
sorry i meant "grab my hair from my face!!"...i think im tired..!!
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You should have held his hands and crushed his fingers..... at least some do that without knowing it! Someone I know was hurting for days! :-)
Impress me..with your intelligence and wit. :-)
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Nov 1st, 2009, 06:38 AM
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#52 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 27, 2009 - 3:25 am
Location: Unho k dil mai...
Posts: 899
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i think it shld b compulsory :P
so they cud see and realize wht circumstances his wife had gone through.
on the other hand it would give relief to the wife also....
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Nov 1st, 2009, 07:18 AM
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#53 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 20, 2008 - 12:54 pm
Location: UK South East
Posts: 3,443
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NJMasti
For all those that are comfy with mom in the labor room - I just don't get it.
I mean you hubby has seen you not your mom! then how can you? oh my gosh !!!!
I would rather choose to die than have mom in the room. (Now don't give me lecture on oh your mom is the one who changed your diaper in the first place)... *horrified*
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I agree with u too. If hubby couldn't be there in time for whatever reason, I would rather go it alone than have ANYONE else there (except for the medical staff, of course).
One must make a mark in this world, if I am remembered for anything, let it be cheese and crackers...
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Nov 1st, 2009, 10:47 AM
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#54 (permalink)
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Member
Join Date: Dec 6, 2008 - 5:13 pm
Posts: 361
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Ok I hate to have to bring this up but I heard women don't have any control over their bowel movements when in labour and also read that numerous husbands have seen their wives take a poop in the delivery room during labour. Off course the nurse cleans it up right away and doesn't mention it, but still, it is utterly disgusting.
After knowing this, would y'all STILL want your husband in there? Sorry I know this is gross, but I'm confused as to why so many women are ok with husbands in there, when there is a chance of that happening? :S
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Nov 1st, 2009, 11:09 AM
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#55 (permalink)
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~Of dark and bright~
Join Date: Nov 16, 2003 - 5:22 am
Location: I'm out of this world!
Posts: 11,403
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Hubby doesn't need to be watching everything that's happening down there. No one's forcing you to have your husband there, but I want mine there. And I would not mind mom (or even MIL maybe) being there. Honestly, if the people close to me can't help me through that challenging time, and can't get over the fact that I don't look like a perfect princess, they aren't worth my time.
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Nov 1st, 2009, 03:08 PM
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#56 (permalink)
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Jersey Girl
Join Date: Jul 29, 2008 - 11:43 am
Location: lost! Can you tell me where I am?!
Posts: 3,020
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Quote:
Originally Posted by candy_apple
Ok I hate to have to bring this up but I heard women don't have any control over their bowel movements when in labour and also read that numerous husbands have seen their wives take a poop in the delivery room during labour. Off course the nurse cleans it up right away and doesn't mention it, but still, it is utterly disgusting.
After knowing this, would y'all STILL want your husband in there? Sorry I know this is gross, but I'm confused as to why so many women are ok with husbands in there, when there is a chance of that happening? :S
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If a hubby decides not to be in the labor room just because of the poopy reason - then I suggest ALL WOMEN in the world - to SAVE UP THAT poop and put it on his face later when you get a chance 
Last edited by NJMasti; Nov 2nd, 2009 at 01:47 AM..
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Nov 2nd, 2009, 12:39 AM
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#57 (permalink)
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Channel Manager Lifestyle
Join Date: Nov 23, 2007 - 2:10 am
Location: At home
Posts: 17,453
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You will not have time to think about the poop et al during that time...plus your husband stands next to you for the most part and doesn't have to look down there. Having your husband there is a great big emotional support. My husband was totally awesome. Remember he is as excited as you are for the final outcome.
Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open...
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Nov 2nd, 2009, 03:44 AM
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#58 (permalink)
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khatoon-e-khaas from delhi darbaar
Join Date: Sep 9, 2000 - 1:00 am
Posts: 3,848
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ure relationship is clearly not there yet or ure not married if u make a comment like 'oh i may poop and i dont want my hsuband to see that'.. jeez...
like sahar said.. if u cant rely on those closest to u at ure greatest time of need.. not much of a relationship u have there to begin with ... just what i think
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Nov 2nd, 2009, 06:38 AM
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#59 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 14, 2001 - 3:00 am
Posts: 4,824
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I had my husband there both times at my side and he was a great help even though he didnt do much. But to have a MAN there, in case something goes wrong.
I agree with NJMasti, I cannot have my mom see me when giving birth, its just not me.
And that I had my husband there, he didnt look at the time the baby came out, I respected that.
Its a great moment and both should be there to enjoy the joy as the baby is born and the relief that its over.
The reason I dont like my mom there, she came in the room as the baby was born and I was covered, she saw some blood on a towel and stated .. oh they could have cleared the room .. so sweet I wonder how she born her 5 kids, it was good to have her there then as she told me to avoid cold water and got me warm tea to drink as i was doing crazy from thirst.
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Nov 2nd, 2009, 07:37 AM
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#60 (permalink)
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Traditionalist
Join Date: Apr 4, 2006 - 4:26 pm
Location: Berkshire
Posts: 10,760
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^awwww
Quote:
Originally Posted by NJMasti
If a hubby decides not to be in the labor room just because of the poopy reason - then I suggest ALL WOMEN in the world - to SAVE UP THAT poop and put it on his face later when you get a chance 
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lolz
"In the fight against the Monoculture, the main sign is the hijab, and the main act is the Prayer". T.J Winter
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