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    Results 1 to 8 of 8
    1. #1
      Ira
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      I have been observing for a while how religion can transform people. They start saying their prayers more regularly, guys grow long, shari-length beards, women start observing hijab and niqab, some people can even be seen walking around with tasbeehs. But once at home, the same people dont seem to have changed at all. Speaking loudly and yelling at their kids, spouses etc., Islam doesnt seem to have changed their behaviour at all. I have even seen someone get real mad at their wife for putting too much mirchi in salan and saying nasty things to her infront of everyone.
      Now we all do this, I am sure. We try to be so religious and Islamic that we start praying 5 times a day plus tahajjud but when it comes to our personal relations, we are still not treating them right. I thought Huqooq ul Ebad come side by side Huqooq uAllah? How can we expect to make Allah happy if we dont treat His creations nicely and respectfully? Am i the only one who is bugged by this observation or are there others ? (I am sure there are). And what do you guys do to fulfill your Huqqoq ul Ebad in a better way? What if you see other people who seem to be religious Muslims but dont treat others nicely? How do you make them realise it?

      This may seem to be a Religion thread but I want it focused more towards relationships. Lets see if we can get some serious replies.
      I love children and old people. Its everyone in between I can't stand - Don Imus

    2. #2
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      I agree.Yes this is very common in our society.Specially people who offer 5 times namaz + tahajjud consider themself as auliya-allah.They think like they are the only one on right paath.They sometimes forget there is something called as haqooq-ul-ebad. When Allah swt talk about Haqooq then it doesn't come just as huqooq-allah.As you said above huqooqul-ebad comes side by side with it.
      But sometimes people never ever think about it, infact they never care that someone is getting hurt by thier behavier.You can't even prompt them directly.You can't make them realize it, cuz they never listen you.In thier opinion , whatever they are doing is right . I have a bad experience of it.

      I don't think we can make them realize.If there is a way then please someone come with the point

    3. #3
      senorita miembro
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      Hmmmm...you have a point.

      Actually, since I started wearing hijab and reading namaz, my behavior/thoughts haven't really changed too much. I still think mean-spirited thoughts about idiots on the subway, esp the guy nxt to me whos nodding off, or is shaking his leg up and down and rubbing it against mine, or hte 200-lb girl wearing low rider jeans and showing her ass crack. I still look at a hot guy and think .. "he's hottttttttttt" and I still talk to my guy friends teh same way i used to before.

      But i smile at every girl i see wearing hijab, and if anyone asks me for directions, i smileand tell them what they need without being a *****. I don't argue (as much) or fight wiht my parents anymore. Then again, I was like that before (minus the parents), so whatever.

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      Your observation is no different than mine Ira.What I feel is when Islam captures the heart and people understands its message and try to follow the right Path,it seems it is easier to follow the ibadah ,i.e pray five times a day,do zikr,tilawat or enhance their knowledge by reading islamic literature,as compared to improve their relationships since it is much difficult to apply Islam truely when dealing with people around you.

      One has to kill the ego to accept their bad behaviours,which is the very first step to improve their general attitude.As copared to which praying namaz seems a bit easier in my humble opinion.

      I have gone through this phase of improving my attitude towards people.This transformation from someone who used to get angry at little unwanted matters to a person who is so humble to ignore things which even hurt you and break you to peices without making complaints to anyone,has drained me out emotionally and all for the sake of Allah's will.Its not easy Ira my dear.And thats why we see so many naik people around us with bad attitudes :-)

    5. #5
      Ira
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      Thanks for your reply zeen.

      Sara516: I am glad you see my point. Most of the things you mentioned, even Iam guilty of doing still, so dont feel bad. The idea is to realise what we are doing is wrong and do rectify it. I have started my namazin again Alhamdulillah and i feel better spritiually but then again: i talk harshly with my siblings some times and i have to stop and realise there is no need to speak to them that way.

      kashish: Its nice tohear you are working on improvng your attitude towards others. I am also in that phase, although i think this is a constant struggle.

      I guess my question is if there is a way to approach people with such attitudes at all?Or should you not even approach them and jsut leave them be?
      I love children and old people. Its everyone in between I can't stand - Don Imus

    6. #6
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      Ira - you are totally right :-) this is something i think abt all the time as well too...

      i mean...on one side you are doing some religious duties, but on the other hand, u dont fulfil ur own huqooq...

      sometimes im shocked by my terrible attitude as a daughter, as a sister and as a friend...

      we really need to peer deep into our souls...

      reminds me of a shayr by bullay shah..

      chad jhagra masjid mandir da
      apnay aap noon insan kar laey

      :S

      p.s. i do think though that u can be a good person but still its extremely important to fulfil religious duties, its all abt self discipline...and religious duties do teach us i think...
      to be very honest, most paanch waqt namazis i know in my real life have been very good ppl as well...not ALL, but MOST...

    7. #7
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      Originally posted by Ira:
      What if you see other people who seem to be religious Muslims but dont treat others nicely? How do you make them realise it?
      Just tell them nicely what they are doing is not right..
      If they are religous, they wouldnt mind you correcting them, they would appreciate it.

    8. #8
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      well, initially i'll say yes i agree with Ira

      BUT....

      doesn't same thing applies when we write n call ourselves muslm but indulge in most acts which don't suit a muslim .....
      usuually when we r asked to correct ourselves we defeend ourselves saying its a matter between ourselves n Allah , who is this person to poke his nose in !

      being not so religious doesn't automatically gives us an NOC to behave how we like .....being a muslim we have to behave the way , Almighty wants us to !

      no i'm not defending any so called religious peron......
      only point i'm trying to make is that if we don't wear hijab /don't have a beard doesn't make us any less muslim .... we too will have to answer about our deeds just like those who look more religious in appearance

      all we muslims living abroad ....once we call ourselves muslim ....we act as ambassedor of our religion .....for non-muslims you r not good or bad muslim .....just a muslim .....YOU will help them percieve what muslims r like .......doesn't matter more/less religious

      sorry ....i intended no offence .....
      this is just my point of view !!