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  • User Tag List

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    1. #1
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      sana020477's Avatar
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      hi need some advice for my sister she is very upset about her motherinlaw who always hurt her by words on purpose fo 15 years her husband doesnt care he loves his mom and doesnt want to tell her off and now my sister wants to cut ties with her but she thinks its gunah to do that what do you think she should do

    2. #2
      Haters gonna hate
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      dunno, maybe she should think her case is out of hundreds of thousands cases? let the old lady say, she should ignore the bad, take the good. if the husband is treating her the same way then it's another problem.

    3. #3
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      well in my case, my in laws just dont want any contact with me or my family what so ever! they speak to my wife only , their daughter is married thats it, they have nothing to do with daughters in-laws! thats their attitude.

      it was very very strange in start, now I dont care.


      in your case, I dont think its good idea to cut off and i guess it will not be possible in practise as you have this woman's son with you for life. how well it will go well with him?

    4. #4
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      Mirch's Avatar
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      How does she plan to cut ties with MIL without cutting ties with her husband ? In desi culture shadi is a complete package you get good and bad and ugly all in one package. You have to deal with it all. If it is a problem with your friend she should be opening a thread here so that we could get some details about what is going on. And based on all the information some good advice can be given. Short of that I will say she can use neela thota to get rid of her MIL. Just kidding.
      For example if her MIL is bad to her all the time she can start with just keeping quite and not answering her. It takes two to tango. If she keeps quite and the MIL see it is just a monologue all the time MIL will ultimately stop harassing her. It is just one scenario I have mentioned there can be many.
      Fools never disagree.

    5. #5
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      In my opinion it is gunnah - you don't have to take her crap but just walk away. Ignore her. You can maintain a distance but you don't need to cut off

      You cannot just cut ties with in laws. You children will suffer because they need these relationships to be a complete person. And you are teaching these things to your children.

      You marriage will also suffer. How can you totally cut off someone that your husbands loves. Best thing is to ignore. Just say to yourself - "she doesn't know any better" - keep on doing what you need to do

    6. #6
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      hmmm...well i think its common that the MIL is nasty to the daughter in law...i think thats how it is to be honest..i thought it might have changed witht the times but obviously not!!

    7. #7
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      She cant possibly make a clean break and cut all ties for good. She is still married to the son of her MIL.

      Also, tell her to ignore as much as possible. I understand its easier said than done but its the best solution. Ignore and pretend as if nothing happened.
      Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames. ~ Rumi

    8. #8
      S02
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      I don't know about gunnah or not, but I would be concerned about on the relationship with her husband suffering if she cuts ties with her mother-in-law. It just doesn't seem like a realistic expectation.

    9. #9
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      ^^ true and she been listning to all that crap for 15 yrs..so whts bothring her now?
      ***Behekti Chokri***

    10. #10
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      cutting ties and relationships is bad, i don't think it is sinful as your sister has no farad or duty Islamically regarding her MIL. It would be haram if your sisters husband cut of ties. Does ur sister live in her own house or with inlaws. If she lives with her inlaws how would her husband feel about getting seperate house as that is ur sistersright islamically. Other than that your sister can do nothing really because she would be coming inbetween son and mother relationship.

    11. #11
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      No it ain't right.

    12. #12
      senorita miembro
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      Why after 15 years?
      The grass ain't always greener on the other side, it's green where you water it.

    13. #13
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      ^ a ticking time bomb maybe?

      i am sorry to say but you can not cut ties with your mil and expect to be living in marital bliss with your hubby. when you marry a man you accept their good and their bad....your mil being the bad (according to you). accept her for who she is...you dont have to like her but you certainly have to learn to deal with her for the sake of your husband and for your marriage.

    14. #14
      S02
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      Does your sis live with her MIL?

    15. #15
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      Of course it's not right. Sorry, but what a stupid question.

    16. #16
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      Quote Originally Posted by Sahar02 View Post
      Does your sis live with her MIL?
      no she dont live with her she lives couple of doors away and her mil is always checkin on them.

    17. #17
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      Y cant women live with peace :S:S
      Last edited by EcoShan; Dec 12th, 2008 at 09:31 PM.
      KON DETA HAI OMAR BHAR KA SAHARA FARAZ
      LOG TU JANAZAY MAIN BHI KAANDHAY BADAL'TE REHTE HAIN

    18. #18
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      Quote Originally Posted by EcoShan View Post
      Y cant women live with piece :S:S
      How are women supposed to live in "pieces"???

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