raven

Apna kuch na rha

Zindagi mein apna ab kuch na raha
ik ko chaha woh bhi milgya zamana say

Halat ha ka rota huen ab be-dharak
Na bhola yeh gum aksar bhulanay say

Kasor tha ka ker betha payar tum sa
Na the khabar payar uth gaya zamanay say

Pal pal sapnay sajayeh in ankhuen mein
Pal sa pehla tora sapna tumna azmanay say

Na ke tum na koshish muja samajhne ki
umr bhar ka khuwab tha,nafrat mein thukraya jisay

Na shumar ratoon ka na hisab ansooyon ka
Intizar terey mein jaga ,misal-e-shama je say

Samjhaya bhut apno na ,ishq ik dard ha
Pana tha tumein ,larta raha jung naseebon say

Umer jitni mili ker betha tumare nam
gar afsos tum na niklay ana ka hijabon say

Ab lagta nahi dil duniyah mein-a-farhan
Darta huen ab aksar duniyah ka nizamon say.

Yeh tere bewafai ka waar be ageb tay
Kamal-e-zabt , muskurata rha zakhm khana say

Tum na to bana lia apni muhabbat ka gulistan
Hum bhatakte rahe aj tak bin saharon kay

Ate nahi ab moot ,zindagi naraz ha
Duk itna mila jese huen gunagaron say

Harpal Socha tumein ,tumare hi mang ke
Mein mangta rha tumein apna khudayon say.

Chaha parna tumein harf ba harf –e- kitab
Katey zindagi parte parte, tum nikla nisabon say

Ab raz-e-dil chupana sa kia faida farhan
Zakm-e-dil dikhnay laga hein chupaney say

Halat mre dekh, kay duniyah udas ha
nend,chen,sakon sab chor gaye sath, ik tre badal janay say.

Isay pachtawa kaho ,yah kaho babasi.
Khudara ! bachna sab kabhi dil lagana say.

Zindagi mein apna ab kuch na rha
ik ko chaha woh bhi milgya zamana say


feel free 2 comment and 2 crticise cause am in need of advice

regards
ra\/en

Golden Scorpion

Again I would say ke its Nice Try :clap:

I am not a POET and Na hi Zyada samjhat hooN ... Here on Our Forum we have lot more Good Poets jo mujh se kafi Zyada smajahtay haiN ... so.... I hope corrctions tou wo kardengay...

Just a coment ..... abt wat we call QAAFIA .. U used the words of diff SOUNDS at the end of Earch verse...

e.g.

At start......

zamana say

bhulanay say

zamanay say

azmanay say

Now... next is....

thukraya jisay

misal-e-shama je say

In donooN ka Qafia Upper Ones se naheeN milta....

Agay.....

naseebon say

hijabon say

nizamon say.

zakhm khana say

saharon kay

gunagaron say

khudayon say.

nisabon say

chupaney say

badal janay say.

dil lagana say.

zamana say

Look at /\ these... Try to Use the Words... ke they sound the same... and it will create beauty in ur Poems.

MaiN ne shuru maiN bhi kaha ke... I am not an expert.. Zaroori naheeN ke wat I said is TRUE

paki_kurri

even better than the first

Sana Khan

do any one one have the poem "mujh se ziada koi tumhain chahe to btana" plz help me i need it its urgent.................. plz.............