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Nov 25th, 2007, 04:38 PM
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#1 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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batao : roka bhi tha na pyar k darya bahanay say
kaha : kia fayda itni bari daulat chupanay say
batao : tumhara zakhm ab tak q mujhay wesa he lagta hai
kaha : kisi nay vaar kar dala maseehayi bahanay say
batao : rat jagon say dosti ab kaisi lagti hai
kaha : meri tanhaayi ghat'ti hai, in k anay say
batao : konsay lamhay ko ab tak yaad kartay ho
kaha : woh waqt thum jana, wo lagna meray shanay say
batao : aj tak mujhko kio tum nay yaad rakha hai
kaha : bhala yadain kub mit'ti hain kisi k dour janay say
batao : ab juda hokar bhala kaisay jeogay tum
kaha : marna to hai ek din, so issi bahanay say
Ussay kaho ke bohat na'murad shay hai junoo'n
Ussay kaho ke mujhe hai bohat junoo'n uss ka
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Nov 25th, 2007, 04:41 PM
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#2 (permalink)
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Jo bhulaey na bhoolay
Join Date: Apr 12, 2007
Location: Lamha-e-mojood
Posts: 7,182
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batao : aj tak mujhko kio tum nay yaad rakha hai
kaha : bhala yadain kub mit'ti hain kisi k dour janay say
awesome!!!.......
the whole feeling of poem is so touchy
good work
"The death from which you flee will truly overtake you: then you will be sent back to the Knower of things secret and open: and He will tell you (the truth of) the things that you did!" (Surat al-Jumu'ah: 8).
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Nov 25th, 2007, 04:44 PM
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#3 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 31, 1969
Location: pata nahi
Posts: 8,368
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hummm
Meray Roz O Shab k Nisaab Main Meray Paas Apna To Kuch Nahi
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Nov 25th, 2007, 04:46 PM
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#4 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 24, 2005
Posts: 1,267
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Zabardast. I love your peotry!
Jal Gayee Meri Dunia, Jal GayeiN Sub Barsataain... Deewanay Dil Ki Kuch Deewani Si BataaiN...
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Nov 25th, 2007, 11:15 PM
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#5 (permalink)
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No one..
Join Date: Apr 13, 2007
Location: Karachi
Posts: 17,708
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ohh God.. it touched my soul.. made me shiver.. 
Beautiful.. Kaash main bhi mukalmati nazm likh sakoon :$
Who cares, when em Hurt..
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Nov 25th, 2007, 11:25 PM
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#6 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 31, 1969
Location: pata nahi
Posts: 8,368
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^ Fakhra batool hay na, kant chant kar ke paste kar dain, khwahish bhi pori ho jay gi bacha log tali bhi bajain ge.
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Nov 26th, 2007, 04:04 AM
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#7 (permalink)
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No one..
Join Date: Apr 13, 2007
Location: Karachi
Posts: 17,708
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^ aap Azad hain.. magar U cannot be that independent ke meri poetry pe iss tarha ke comments paas karain..
mind ur word selection.. :s
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Nov 26th, 2007, 04:05 AM
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#8 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 21, 2007
Location: dreamland
Posts: 6,446
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A Wonderful Piece of poetry janab!!!!
bohat he umdaa sharing 
Live N Let Live...............
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Nov 26th, 2007, 04:20 AM
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#9 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 31, 1969
Location: pata nahi
Posts: 8,368
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redidentity
^ aap Azad hain.. magar U cannot be that independent ke meri poetry pe iss tarha ke comments paas karain..
mind ur word selection.. :s
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chalain aap ko words pasand nahi aay to aap ki pasand
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:32 AM
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#10 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bheegiyaad
batao : aj tak mujhko kio tum nay yaad rakha hai
kaha : bhala yadain kub mit'ti hain kisi k dour janay say
awesome!!!.......
the whole feeling of poem is so touchy
good work
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thx bheegi
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:33 AM
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#11 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fara
Zabardast. I love your peotry!
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sharminda na karain fara
thx
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:36 AM
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#12 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redidentity
ohh God.. it touched my soul.. made me shiver..
Beautiful.. Kaash main bhi mukalmati nazm likh sakoon :$ |
buhat buhat shukrya red
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:38 AM
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#13 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azad
^ Fakhra batool hay na, kant chant kar ke paste kar dain, khwahish bhi pori ho jay gi bacha log tali bhi bajain ge.
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hmmmm
tanqeed karna dunya ka sub say asaan kaam hai
aur shayad ap iss me maahir hain
dosron ko mashwara denay say behtar hota hai k khud koshish ki jayay
Last edited by deadsoul; Nov 26th, 2007 at 08:49 AM..
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:40 AM
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#14 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by soniaa_jee
A Wonderful Piece of poetry janab!!!!
bohat he umdaa sharing |
thx sonia
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:51 AM
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#15 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 31, 1969
Location: pata nahi
Posts: 8,368
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deadsoul
hmmmm
tanqeed karna dunya ka sub say asaan kaam hai
aur shayad ap iss me maahir hain
dosron ko mashwara denay say behtar hota hai k khud koshish ki jayay
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jee baja farmaya aap ne, or tanqeed bardasht karna sub se muskil, mouft ke mashwaray ka shukriya aghar kabhi zindagi main lekhna howa to aap se mashwara zaroor karain ge.
adab.
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:58 AM
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#16 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 13, 2006
Posts: 2,839
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azad
jee baja farmaya aap ne, or tanqeed bardasht karna sub se muskil, mouft ke mashwaray ka shukriya aghar kabhi zindagi main lekhna howa to aap se mashwara zaroor karain ge.
adab.
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ji han
tanqeeb barayay islah bardasht ki ja sakti hai
magar tanqeed barayay tanqeed nahi
adaab*2
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Nov 26th, 2007, 08:59 AM
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#17 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 31, 1969
Location: pata nahi
Posts: 8,368
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yeh faisla kon karta hay kis ki tanqeed islah ki hay or konsi baray tanqeed hay?
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Nov 26th, 2007, 09:00 AM
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#18 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 21, 2007
Location: dreamland
Posts: 6,446
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azad
jee baja farmaya aap ne, or tanqeed bardasht karna sub se muskil, mouft ke mashwaray ka shukriya aghar kabhi zindagi main lekhna howa to aap se mashwara zaroor karain ge.
adab.
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waisay Live n let live walay asool par amal ki jiay ga janab..............kisee ki khushee bardasht karna bhi mushkil kaam hai.....jalnay ki zaroorat nahi app ko.....app bhi likh saktay hain sab ki tarhan ..try kar k dekhiay ga
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Nov 26th, 2007, 09:00 AM
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#19 (permalink)
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Jo bhulaey na bhoolay
Join Date: Apr 12, 2007
Location: Lamha-e-mojood
Posts: 7,182
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larai larai maaf karo iss thread ko saaf karo 
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Nov 26th, 2007, 09:01 AM
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#20 (permalink)
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Jo bhulaey na bhoolay
Join Date: Apr 12, 2007
Location: Lamha-e-mojood
Posts: 7,182
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azad
yeh faisla kon karta hay kis ki tanqeed islah ki hay or konsi baray tanqeed hay?
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likhnay walay ko pata hota hai ya pata chal jata hai
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